Things I have Learned

As I begin another a year of life today, allow me to bring to you twelve things I have learned over the years about life and ministry.

I am so grateful to God for the people who have believed in me and invested in my life. In the days of my youth, there was a Baptist missionary by the name of Mrs Thomas. She looked me in the eye when I was fourteen and told me I will one day be a great dad. I never forgot that.

Then in my early twenties, there was another Baptist missionary who poured into my life, Ms Lillie Rogers. She often told me I will one day be a great pastor and teacher of the Word. Then, I use to doubt her but now I thank God, he sent her to move me into my calling.

In the early years of ministry, there was Mrs Lim, an elderly woman in my church. She kept saying that no matter what I should never give up. Just trust the Lord and obey, was her mantra. I thank the Lord for planting deep in my soul the spirit of endurance. I see today how necessary it is to keep one's eyes on the Lord and run the race with endurance.

In the last few years, I found a mentor in my friend, Edmund Chan. He taught me to honour the inner life and nurture the soul over everything else. And that brought my ministry to a whole new depth in God.

In all of these, the three people who have given me the reason to celebrate life are my wife, Christina, who is going to be all mine, now that the children are grown; my daughter Thea, who keeps me sharp in my thinking and strong in my convictions and my son, Reuben whose zest for life and courage to take yet another challenge continually inspires me.

Now, here are the twelve things I have learned:

1. The right road always leads to the right place; therefore, get on the right road and go as far as you can on it.

Over the years I am totally persuaded that wrong means do not lead to right ends. Or, more positively, I am persuaded that living in the right way—that is, doing the right things, though they may be painful and difficult—are the means that inevitably lead to where God wants me to be. So I have learned never to quit when the going gets tough but to keep my soul clean where I am, and in God’s time, the door to the next room opens.

2. There is only one thing to do about anything; that is the right thing. Do right.

Doing the right thing may go against the will of the flesh; it may hurt the pride; it may take great moral courage but does it really matter because when I do the right thing, God will always bring the eventual right results and rewards.

3. Happiness is not found by looking for it. You stumble over happiness on the road to doing what is right.

Joy is always in something. Joy itself is not the something. So we seek joy in Christ. When doing what is right is hard and we do not feel joy in doing it, we should still do it, and pray that in the doing, the joy would be given. I have discovered that over time, joy joins duty and then duty gets transformed to delight.

4. The door to success swings on the hinges of opposition.

I have been a pastor for seventeen years now and in looking back I know that whenever there is opposition I can also expect success. One can think of many biblical examples. The opposition of Joseph’s brothers opened the door to his leadership in Egypt. The taxing of the empire opened the door to getting the Messiah born in Bethlehem, not Nazareth, and thus fulfilling prophecy. The betrayal of Judas opened the door to the salvation of the world. Hence, by God's grace, I now am able to look at opposition as opportunity for greater success in Christ. That keeps me from the fear of any opposition.

5. God in the right place in my life fixes every other relationship of life (Matthew 6:33).

All I need to do with my life is put God in the centre. I must live a Christ-centred life. Then I find every other relationship falling into its place - relationship with my wife and children; my staff and leaders; and all other relationships. Look at the solar system. If God is the blazing centre of the solar system of our lives, then all the planets will be held in their proper orbit. But if not, everything goes awry.

6. It is never right to get the right thing in the wrong way—like good grades, wealth, power, position. Don’t compromise your principles.

I have learned that God blesses the principled, not the pragmatic, person. Early in our courtship, I told Christina, to whom I am now married for 23 years, that we do our courtship God's way, then we will have a marriage that is truly God-blessed. I told her because we want to be biblical Christians ( and not just cultural Christians), we will be counter-cultural in the way we do marriage and parenting. We won't do the right thing the wrong way. And it has so paid off.

7. It is a sin to do less than your best. It is wrong to do [merely] well.

“Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might” (Ecclesiastes 9:10 ). But be careful. Sometimes the “best” is a B+ sermon because you have to spend time with your family. Doing the best does not mean you do very well in that one thing at the expense of the other important things in your life. You may prepare the "best" sermon while giving your family the scraps of your time. In other words, “best” always involves more decisions than the one you are making at the moment. So “best” is always the whole thing, not just the detail of the moment.

8. The part of your character that is deficient is the part that needs attention.

This is the counterpoint to the advice: Go with your strengths. There is truth in both. Yes, be encouraged by every evidence of God’s grace in your life, and use your gifts and graces for his glory. But you will become smug and vain if you do not keep your deficiencies before you and work on them continually.

To this day, I am still working through those deficiencies in my character. Sometimes I get them strengthened and at other times not. I realize these are 'no-trophy' victories in my life. It keeps me humble before God and men.

9. Don’t quit. Finish the job. God can’t use a quitter.

Warning: “He who endures to the end will be saved” (Mark 13:13). Promise: “He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6).

10. Anything you do that hinders your progress for God is wrong.

O how thankful I am that this is the dominant way my mentors pressed me to pursue my sanctification. They did not mainly impose lists of don’ts on me. And they were clear. Mainly, I must maximize my progress in knowing and serving God. The one thing that determines everything in my life is that all my life, in all I do, I pursue Christ. That has ruled out a hundred foolish behaviours, some bad and some uselessly innocent.

11. Beware of any group of people in which you feel compelled to put a bushel over your testimony.

I struggled much in my young adult years of wanting to make a stand for Jesus, yet not wanting to look like a fool among my friends and colleagues. I later made the decision that I can go into a group of people who are evil if I am willing to open my mouth and take a stand for Jesus and righteousness. Nevertheless, 1 Corinthians 15:33 stands: “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good character.’”

12. It isn’t enough to be good. Be good for something. The essence of Christianity is not a passionless purity.

My life and ministry took a turning point in 1997 when God called my church to take the community. Ministry has never been the same since. It is a wonderful feeling to know that the good God does in you is meant for you to pour into others for their good. This has become the compelling theme of my ministry life.